Thursday, October 29, 2009


My email to coach yesterday - if that workout was supposed to break me, you have succeeded. I had a 60 mile ride with three intervals mixed in and a transitional run. This was to be my 'last' real workout for the next 10 days before Beach2Battleship. The whole thing just broke me. I didn't want to ride, particularly, so my mental game was not on but I was going to make the best of it. Needless to say, upon my return, I said to Ryan - that sucked, I sucked. He looked at my computer and said - wow, yeah, you sucked. Are you going to be that guy that shows up at the race with all the latest and greatest gear but doesn't have the engine to back it up? You know that guy. He's the one with the disc wheel being passed by someone on a hybrid or road bike. I love my road bike, but you know what I'm getting at here. I now have this huge fear of being that guy. Thankfully, it's taper time and I've been given the thumbs up to take an extra day off from working out. I will gladly take it. Just as my happy ass was in bed, asleep at 8:15 last nite.

The torture didn't end after that bike ride either.

Helpful Tip:

NEVER EVER get waxed after a 60 mile bike ride. Dear Mother of GAWD! I make my appointments months in advance and do NOT consult my workout schedule when making the appointment. I will from now on. Besides the fact my lady told me it was going to be rough when she saw IT, I actually think I cried. I know I yelled and called her an effenbiatch. She just laughed at me. I would have rather had each one plucked individually, if that is any indication. Holy hell, learn from my mistake.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Monday, October 26, 2009

Snot Rockets!

So, I'm listening to a morning show and they pose the question - what is a disgusting habit that your spouse or SO does that you can't stand? The range was everything from really gross, biting toenails to more simple stuff like leaving the bathroom door open. The finishing one that the host of the show could NOT get over was a woman with a runny nose and impending snot rocket. Apparently, he was watching a triathlon on tv and saw a woman going through an aid station grabbing water with a string of snot coming from her nose and THEN (gasp) she did a farmer's blow. The studio crowd was totally disgusted and could NOT figure out WHY this woman couldn't get a tissue at the aid station to blow her nose because that was just SO disgusting. I was actually laughing thinking - it's simple, it takes too much time. Can't waste time on a booger when seconds count. Of course, it seemed so simple to me but I guess it's NOT normal to the general population.
This lovely moment was captured post race so it still counts as a race moment. Muncie Endurathon in 2008 and I was sick as a dog. I had to evacuate my nose constantly. It was captured on film...I was out of tissue...I don't know that ever had any. Ewwwww, the radio show host would be disgusted!
I got in ~80 miles of bike, a baby sized run and some swimming this weekend. Of that 80, 20 of it was my 20 mile TT. I have a knack for choosing the crappiest day of the weekend. Of course, I rode on the coldest, windiest of the two days - niceeee! I was not happy with the NUMBER that saw but my effort was there because I was spent. My legs are still cashed from this weekend. Today, I will rest. Now, it's the countdown, less than two weeks to B2B. Woohoo.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

100! You lucky devil...

So it's official, I have 100 followers - yay Jason. Hell, I know that at least half of them I have offended and don't come back any longer OR they are out of the bloggy world and have never updated their status. Oh well, I'll enjoy my moment! the rest of yous, thanks for stopping by whether you comment or not...but you really should because we're just so much fun over here!

BESIDES the passing of our faithful friend, I have been getting most of the work done. Thank GAWD because I'm here to tell you - you can verbally shoot me next year if I try to sign up for a late season race (long distance tri). All my friends are on to fun stuff and I still have a freakin schedule. HOWEVER, just a few more important days to pack in before I get to taper. Ahhh, taper. I'm not a freak like most of you - I LOVE to taper and welcome the time off (ok, just less work).

Wednesday after we bid farewell to big Kasha, we had to hammer out some ride time to workout the frustration and stress. A solid 30 mile ride with friends who understood our ability or need to talk or not talk, as it were. I would fall into tears at any given moment and very fragile (yes, fragile, that's Italian). I'm like a delicate flower - OK even that made ME laugh.

Thursday morning - on the rapey wooded trail - mile repeats. Coach and I got our wires crossed and I ended up at the rapey wooded one mile trail alone at 5:30 am. To warm up, I just ran back and forth on a lit portion of road and waited. I ain't going 'back there' alone for crying out loud. For reference, my early season mile splits were: 7:27, 7:25, 7:15 and this Thursday (drum roll) 7:17, 7:20 (oops), 7:07 (barftastic). I seriously don't know how you super fast peeps do it. At 7:07, I almost puked BUT I did not pee on myself this time. Bonus! Think dog that gets excited and involuntarily pees on themselves. That's me. Great physical reaction.

I'm looking at a wet road but a dry sky...20 mile TT on tap today. C'mon dry roads!

Sincerest thanks to everyone for their kind words. To those that think I'm crazy and 'it's just a dog,' you're right, she was a dog and she was our dog, our first dog, and she rocked!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

It's a lifethings kind of day...

Rest in Peace Kasha. You're in a place where you have four good legs. Now you can really go chase that bunny! We miss you.

Dear Kasha,

I remember the day we picked you out of the litter. You chose us as much as we chose you. You were the feisty one we just had to have. You know, we were going to get a Doberman instead? I know, dumb idea. They're great too but YOU sold us on the Boxer. We had to have you with your little black nose, all that loose skin and puppy breath. I do love some puppy breath. I could not have asked for a better or more well mannered puppy. From our days in the apartment, to our move to a house, you were the best puppy. You NEVER cried and rarely had an accident in the house or crate...unlike your 'brother' but I digress. There were a few lost shoes, a book (that I never read the ending), a remote control and an ink pen on the new carpet but it was all a small price to pay. I'm sure I didn't think that at the time when there was a giant blue ink stain on the carpet. We spent hours training and even longer hours chasing a frisbee. Do you even remember that? I know it's been a really long time but you could not get enough. You and your boyfriends, the Jack Russell's that lived behind us, you wore out a frisbee path in the back yard.

I think you're more well traveled than most people I know. We took you EVERYWHERE. You were welcome most everywhere because you were so well mannered. We will 'forget' the teenage years where you were a royal b!@#$ and wanted to Alpha Dog every animal in sight. I blame it on the steroids. I know, that vet was a crack pot. Glad we got rid of him. Anyway, you were always a warrior, a road warrior with us or a warrior on the 'playing field.' One time, you had a cracked tooth, Dr. Woody just opened your mouth and grabbed some pliers to pull it. You didn't say a peep, nary a wince, cry or whimper. You are truly the toughest of the bunch. Magnus is such a tender-hearted wimp, bless him. He can't get a shot without crying in pain. I know, what a baby.

It is with the deepest pain in my heart that I have to say good bye. I just can't let you go on this way. This is not you, the warrior dog. While we all get old and aren't as agile as we used to be, this is too much to ask of you. You can't hardly stand on your own, you fall, spread eagle at least 10 times a day and you have to be carried down anything that resembles a step. This is not how you need to be. This is not YOU.

To my warrior princess who made me laugh, smile, and welcomed me home every day with your wiggly butt and nub, who tried to save swimmers that were 'drowning', and liked to eat corn on the cob, I guess it is time, it is your time. Thanks for all the memories, thanks for the unconditional love, thanks for keeping me company when I was sick and guarding the house loyally every single day. Thanks for kicking Magnus' butt, even in your old age and keeping him in line, you trained him well. I don't know what he's going to do, I really don't. I imagine he will hold vigil for a while. Ryan says he's taking him to work a bunch because he's afraid Magnus will freak out at home alone. See, he's never been alone, he's always had you. Heck, Ryan and I have always had you. Almost as long as we've been together, you've been there with us.

This just sucks, I don't want to say good-bye but I can't be selfish any longer either. I love you, Kasha Bear.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Monday, October 19, 2009

Weekend in Review

When hubs is away, we will play! Yeah, not really, I just had tons of workouts, lots of wine to drink with friends and quality time with two dawgs. And it all unfolded like this...

Friday - up and running at 4:45am. Not preferable but sometimes you just have to do it when you can. I had to run for two hours before work. You can officially call me a mall walker. I ran down to the mall and looped their parking lot a few times before heading back. You know the terrain is kinda perfect, gradual grade changes, good road, lights and bushes in which to pee in. What is NOT good is running by Krispy Kreme Donuts and Panera Bread. It was cruel and unusual punishment. The smells coming out was just pure sugar and cinnamon and it was spectacular...OH, but this gel will do. Nasty. 12.5 miles before 7am, book it.

Friday nite I needed a drink or drinks as it were. My Coach and Mrs. Coach were kind enough to have me over to help drain their wine collection. Lots of laughs, as always. Even some exploding wine. After I got home and worked my way to bed, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to have the dogs sleep with me. Ryan is gone, they can have his spot. We don't let them in our bed so this was a big treat. I lift grandma into bed and Magnus makes himself a little nest. Perfect. We're all holding paws and all is well with the world. UNTIL, Magnus is up whirling again, Kasha takes time to clean her paws, back to sleep, OMG what is that smell? Yes, Kasha's ass was near my head and just farting it up. I was awoken from my slumber by the smell of dog to my head! This was also near Ryan's pillow. I really need to wash the sheets. Now, I remember why I don't let them sleep in the bed.

Yeah, they look so innocent!

Saturday was long ride day - 3:30 hour ride on tap, meeting coach at 10:30. It was gray, overcast, cold, damp and windy. We get talking and I tell him 3-3:30 would be just fine with me and I'll run extra when I get home. As always, tailwind on the outbound. When you're cruising at 24mph and not really working for it, you know you're IN for it on the way back. All was uneventful until we took a wrong turn. Yep, out in nodunkpodunk and we don't know where we are. Yes, I have google maps but I couldn't even tell you which way was north. SOOO, we just starting riding into the headwind, duh. We knew it was going to kick our butts so we just turned into it and started heading back, or what we thought was 'back.' We didn't see anything particularly interesting except for the one guy, waving at us from his truck like a girl, a limp wrist-ed wave, if you will. See, country folk give you the one or two finger salute off the steering wheel (not even the middle finger) so this was weird. His license plate on the front of his truck - CatLvr - this explains everything. Anyway, we make it to a road and store we are familiar with at about 3:15. The thought of calling my dad seriously crossed my mind, bag it and get me home. I didn't want coach to have that in his arsenal of stories, however. Remember when you pussed out and called your daddy? Yeah, I couldn't live with that. We forged on. I saw my front door 4:28 hours later. Add in one cheeseburger and fries + a HOT shower and I was golden. Hunkered down with the kids for the rest of the nite. I don't even know what I watched. Oh, yeah, I bagged the little 30 minute run I was supposed to do. I don't even feel bad about it.

Sunday - was SUPPOSED to be my 10 mile TT. Um, I'm not doing a 10 mile TT in below 40 degree weather. Trainer time! Gross but preferable at this point. Why is it that I can get bundled up and 'cold ride' on a road bike but not my TT? It's just wrong. Swim in the afternoon (4000 metres for my Canadian friends), some pizza with pops and football! Poor Titans. They're looking like the Lions of last year. I have some tickets for sale.

Are we there yet?

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Three Weeks, really?

I'm in that - I'm just ready for it to be here, phase. I'm done with training, I'm done with 4am, I'm just, well, done. My friends are on to off season/non-structured training and I'm just jealous. You know, ride if you feel like it, run if you wanna type stuff. I swear we wish our lives away with these races some times. You look so forward to something and then it's HERE and done and it's a new year already. I CAN say that I learned so much from ironman training last year that it's been helpful to avoid some of the pitfalls that an A type can get caught in, like...

It's on my schedule so I have to do it. It doesn't matter that I only got 5 hours of sleep because the dog was puking and I had to got to work. You know what, 5 hours isn't doing anyone any good. If you go into your workout spent, all you're going to get is garbage out. BUT I'm a sleeper, NEED my sleep.

My family wants to go out to dinner with me but I have to do a one hour trainer ride or something. A one hour 'anything' can me moved to another time. Family can NOT. Who else is going to carry all your shit to your races? Yep, the peeps that love you the most. Make the time - even if it means you have to double up one day.

Sick - skip it. Driving yourself into the ground does nothing for your fitness. To top it off, don't even try to make it up. Just skip it and pick it up when you can. This does not mean be a pu$$y but if you're truly sick, sleep and hot toddy!

Balance - I have actually been able to achieve some this year. I suppose it's the difference of 14 hours of training and 22, not to mention the extra sleep and recovery I needed at 22 hours a week. It's just nice, it's just nice to feel like I can see friends when I'm not swimming, cycling or running. Just to go out, have drinks and eat bad for you food, it's just great.

Training Front - Run, Swim, Bike yesterday - in that order. Didn't mean to, it just worked out that way. We've been having so much rain that you just need to ride when you get a moment of dry.

Randomness - The Biggest Loser - Tracey (or whatever her name is) is freakin CRAZY. I know they edit the show accordingly but c'mon, she's a NUT job and that team is stoooopid for not getting her out of there.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Monday, October 12, 2009

Weekend in Review!

Sorry for the delay, I got thrown for a loop with some kind of funky. I believe I have shaken it. It was one of those times where you just feel like the funk is sinking its grips into you. I'm thankful it was nothing worse. Some Emergen-C, Aleve, sleep, repeat, seemed to have beaten it.

ANYWAY, last weekend saw my longest run of the year at 14ish miles with an average pace of 8:53. I was perfectly pleased with that....also happy to not have to run any longer. Nothing significant to report other than people don't look happy running, mostly. I mean, a hello, hi, wave, something people. I realize you've got your headphones in and I do not but you don't have to be rude. Sheesh. One lady looked like she led a miserable life - she always does too. I try to say hi but then call her a bitch as she passes. And no, she's not deaf, I thought of that too.

My quality ride for the week was to be a three hour ride. No big deal, I thought. Ever just have something not feel right? It wasn't terrible or even a melt down it just wasn't all it could be. I ended with an 18.5avg and was not too happy with that. For whatever reason, it just pissed me off. I guess I just felt like I worked harder and 'deserved' more from that ride. Oh well, it's in the books.

Pre-ride and it was cccold out. I love the arm warmer with sleeveless look, oh well, it works even if I look dorky. Other peoples I saw had on pants and jackets...wimps!
A farewell from Big Magnus! He's not sure I'm ever coming home.

Nutrition and the return of Count Flatula - for the love of Pete I must figure out my nutrition, uh, like yesterday. One thing doesn't absorb well, another gives me gas. I tried the CarboPro1200 for my bike ride and water. Yep, Count Flatula returned with the most horrendous nasal symphony ever. I suppose I'm just glad Count Flatula was not Count Shatula...that would REALLY suck. So, I will try it one more time and then I'm on to...the next thing. You think I would have this figured out by now. Short races just don't require so much and makes it easy to manage. I mean, if I end a sprint on the weak side or slightly dehydrated, that just means I did something right and didn't waste time. Try that for 70.3+ and you're in deep crap.

I have no idea how Ryan caught this as I was leaving. Look at the pockets on the back of this thing (navy blue line on my BACK) - hell, I'd have to reach over my shoulder to get a gel out for crying out loud!

Thursday, October 8, 2009


I have been saving this post because I just didn't know what to call it. I think pleather best sums it up. I received many 'condolences' about my cooter pain on one of my last long bike rides that I had to share with all y'all. (That's how we roll in the South, all y'all because y'all isn't enough.) I even received some helpful suggestions like a bike fit or new bike seat. The truth is, it's not cooter pain as much as pain and rubbing where the leg and cooter come together. This would be where my shorts bunch a little and then, yes, friction. No bush fire, no worries. It burned, I whined and I thought that was the end of it, some good, general pissing and moaning. UNTIL I IT woke me up in the middle of the nite! What is that itching? I know I don't have bugs. Mom used to ask anyone, do you have bugs? Whenever anyone was itching 'down there' - no joke, couldn't make it up.

The next day, I check IT out. WTF, it looks like, it looks like, pleather! I don't know how else to describe it. What happened - raw skin, small baby sized scabs made for pleather. It WAS the most unsightly thing I have seen in a LONG time (think lady who laid out in the sun for 100 years). NO joke. It was ugly. I suppose I have been 'cocky' in my attitude towards lube, bodyglide or anything else to help with the friction. I just chalked it up to my new Unitard. I know you are very concerned but all is well with her, healed up and I have, once again, discovered the wonders of body glide. Bless it. I thought I was losing my mind.

In workout news...
I did a disproportionate sized 'tri' on Wednesday. It was heavy on the swim but if I'm getting wet, it's gonna count.

3000 yard swim - less than an hour, did not really keep track
23 mile bike - pace 18.6mph - satisfactory
3 mile run - 8:15 pace/satisfactory

I was perfectly pleased with these numbers for my little sprint that I did. As I'm running, I'm just thinking - please let the stars align, Mother Nature be happy, and have a day (on Nov. 7) as gorgeous as this. It's not too much to ask for, is it? I've been a good girl this year, mostly. A perfect day would be the gift I could hope for to help me to the PR I'm working towards!

This is totally worth three minutes of your life if you've never seen it. I want to be her someday.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Chapter 1

I wasn't familiar with this stretch of road. It is fabled in these parts. It's one of those hills that all you have to do is say the name and people go, oohhh, yeah, Pulltight, and then they look at you like you're retarded when you tell them you have to ride up it. Three times. This was my fate on Sunday, hill repeats on the bike. It wouldn't be so bad if my Saturday ride wasn't so windy that I felt like I had already climbed it three times - my hammys and glutes were already screaming. I sat in front of the computer on Sunday morning, drinking coffee until hubs pulls up the radar, uh, green, yep, green. You better get going, he says, fine, fine, I'll go, to a place I've never been.

I throw my shiz together. It's funny how it used to take forever to 'get ready' to go for a ride. It's just second nature now. You know exactly what you need and can be gone in 15 minutes. Map in hand, I leave the house, I look down, no Garmin. Oh well, I don't really need to know what the grade of this hill is or that my heart rate is sky high. Do I? I arrive at the 'store' and park in front of the portocan, thank gawd. I had to pee, always do, it seems. And then, the rain comes, it's cold and I start whining. Ever want to tell YOURSELF to shut the hell up? That was me. I was like a little kid - but ma, I don't wannnnnaaaaa. It rains harder. This isn't going to get done on its own. I venture off in the direction of Pulltight. (This picture was taken on a much clearer day by some generous person on the interwebs.)

This particular area of country is funny - total lack of zoning laws. Trailer with chickens and possibly a meth lab inside just down the street from a million dollar farm. I don't think there's trash service or city water out here, but I digress. I try to warm up but can't, it's just cold. I'm already in my small chain ring and I KNOW I haven't started climbing yet, I'm just trying to get to the HILL part. Some guinea hens block my path, a steer gives me a snort, I think a cow mooing is a car and moooove on over. The rain is hitting my glasses and my asses. I can feel the mud just building up on my pants and back like I crapped myself. It's always a good look. The dogs are barking and my head spins, thankfully, penned up. The trees clear and I see IT - I see a road that seems to be carved into the side of a mountain (I know, it's just a hill). I'm looking at it just thinking, I'm not going to make it, not going to make it three times. OK, self, once, if you do it once you can go home. Forward MARCH...

It was a march, a bit of a death march. It was all so symbolic of the week I had, shitty, crappy, is it rain or is it tears, I can't tell which. My glasses are fogging but I can clearly see 40, that's a cadence of 40. Do YOU know at what cadence one rolls backwards? That would be 39. I make it up this mountain goat of a road, not quite sure where to stop until I saw the drop. OK, back down the same side. You did it once, you can do it twice.

What is the fun of going up? Coming down, duh. When the ground is wet and it's still raining, wet brakes make for good times. The descent sucked since I couldn't just open it up. It was pretty much white knuckles and wet brakes. Turn around, back up, if you can do it once, you can do it twice. If you do it twice, you can go home. Fine, fine.

Part way up, I see the road cut into the 'mountain' and I get a lump in my throat and my heart starts to race. I can't do this today, I just can't do this today, I can feel myself start to cry. Stop it you weakling, do you WANT this? Do you WANT your PR? Are you going to throw all this work down the drain because of last week? If you do, you're a huge pussy! This fight went on in my head for, what felt like, hours. It was only a minute or two. The lump in my throat went back down into my guts and I climbed. Sweet, two down, turn and burn.

Back at the bottom I reminded myself that I said I could go home now. What's one more? Make it the three that coach told you to do in the first place and buy yourself a chicken biscuit and a coke at the store when you get back.

It's raining harder, my legs are fried, fried from Saturday, fried from the last two climbs. If it's even possible, I'm getting slower, I'm moving my upper body too much but I can't keep all the weight in my legs. Shit, shit, shit, push, pull, push, pull, circles, circles, circles. AH, I made it, #3 in the books. Now time to haul ass back to the car for my chicken biscuit.

I look at my ass in the window, yep, looks like I crapped myself. I run into the store, no chicken biscuits. I guess I just assumed every country store in TN had a chicken biscuit. It was not to be. To show my gratitude for letting me park there, I bought a coke and hit the road. A searing hot shower is in order...

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Well Wishes and Best Inentions

Thanks to everyone for their well wishes during this very challenging and stressful time. I think I'm living on the Pepcid because the acid in my gut seems to come to the surface regularly. Basically, I just feel like I'm going to barf all the time. The stress won't let me sleep and I can do little else but think about what I'm going to do next. And, no, I can't just wing it for a while and see what happens.

On the training front, I DID skip a workout this week. This is not common for me but I was afraid if I got into the pool, I would not come up for air. I've got a four hour bike today and a short run, hill repeats on the bike tomorrow and a swim. I'm trying to keep this part of my life together. I've invested too much time and energy in making it happen.

I'm starting to think that B2B might be ffreeezzzing by Nov.7 with this cold front that has come through. Dang, getting on a bike while you're soaking wet and it's 50 degrees makes for a cccollld day and ride.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

!@#$%^&^ This Day

Normal, fun, jovial Missy is taking a day off today. Irritated, sad, mad, disgusted, pissed Missy has taken over her body and thoughts. This huge f-bomb was dropped on my world yesterday. Stay tuned, I'm sure our regular programming will return shortly. I'm just too pissed and sickened to really even think right now.

IronMissy - it's official!

IronMissy - it's official!
A vision in green!