Monday, February 9, 2009

Funny Mom Stories for Monday

I really need to update this picture but it was one of her favorites....the most movie staresque picture she had. I don't know why but I always feel the need to put the disclaimer here so people don't think I'm being disparaging to my mom. Why do you care, she was MY mom anyway? Disclaimer: I'm not divulging anything here my mom wouldn't tell you if she were alive. She was the funniest, silliest person I know and my very best friend. She's the one at the party that everyone wants to be around - the magnet in the room, why, because she was funnn.

Mom was in the hospital with cancer, round one. She's in her room and I'm coming in for visiting hours (at which point I'd camp out there all day until they kicked me out). I walk in and she has the TV on...

Hi Mom, uh, what are you watching (I need to check to ensure she hasn't lost her mind).

Sesame Street

Why, again?
It's the best thing on TV - you remember Grover, Cookie Monster, Bert and his gay friend Ernie. Daytime TV sucks, did you know? There isn't jack shit on.

You're right ma, I'm sure you're sick of TV and nothing to do.

Hey, please don't tell me I look like this guy? changes the channel

Remember this nut job, Marshall Applewhite and his peeps were going to heaven after cutting their nuts off, killing themselves and hopping on the Hale-Bopp Comet?

No mom, you don't look like that nut job.

Good, I was getting worried. He and his crew of crackpots are ALL that is on TV right now and I was starting to think that I was looking in the mirror.

Minutes later, she has dozed off, I see that her thumb is on the morphine drip button, holding it down.


Uh-huh ?

You know that you can't have the whole bag of morphine - they regulate it and you can only hit it once every 12 minutes.

Uh-huh, but it's so damn good, I was just hoping!

That one's not as hilarious as some others but she was a stitch, even through it all.

On the training front - BEAUTIFUL weekend here. Ran a whopping two, yep, two miles today at a killer pace. Oh well, I wasn't walking, anyway. Ankle is feeling good but is now fat and swollen. ~3500 meters in the pool and got a ride in too and almost puked on my shoes. Did team and individual time trials in class, gave it my all, sucked at both and almost puked at the end. A sign that you've worked hard enough for the day... in my book.


Melanie said...

funny story :) Great job on the workouts! Hope the ankle feels better soon!

Carly said...

LOL. I love reading stories about your mom. They always make me laugh.

Take care of the ankle. I hope it is feeling better soon.

jahowie said...

I can remember pushing that morphine button over and over again. Your Mom was a beautiful woman. Thanks for sharing the story with us.

Take care of that ankle!!

Wes said...

Definitely a stitch... :-)

Puking is a good sign!! I'll have to remember that one ;-)

Lana said...

That IS a beautiful picture of your mom. I love these stories! No wonder you are fond of her!

Diana said...

Love the pic of your Mom and I relate in many, many many ways to your "mom" stories as I feel the same way as mine. If only we could bring them back for one day! Mine would be so proud of me watching me run!
Thanks for running for me today...I appreciate it! :-)
Once this stomach bug is identified and fixed, I'm running long.....!

Runner Leana said...

I love your mom stories, and that is a beautiful picture of her.

Boo for the cankle! I hope it is better soon!

Shannon said...

Sorry bout' the ankle and I love your posts about your mom. LOL

Jo Lynn said...

I hope my daughter has some good stories after I'm gone. ;)
And oh that almost puking feeling from over-exertion? Lovely, isn't it? Thanks for sharing the funny stories about your mom.

IronMissy - it's official!

IronMissy - it's official!
A vision in green!