Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Biggest Loser and My 'First' Run

First things first...The Biggest Loser

What planet is Joelle from??? Can someone please answer that question? It's like nothing registers in her pea brain, she doesn't hear anything and then she gets that real vague, glassy look in her eye. She has lost some weight but holy crap, that's what we kids used to call a true space cadet. I'm actually going to miss her, I think. I will have to find someone new to pick on - man, that's mean. I'm sorry to say that the brown team isn't long for this world (I hope I'm wrong). I'm so sickly fascinated by the dad's body... I can't look away. I don't understand all the crying either - I'm sure that's creative editing but jeeze. Don't get me wrong, I will have to get it out once in a while but man, these people would suck the life out of me.

My 'First' Run...

OK, it's a whopping 15 degrees in TN, I know, I know, whawahwah, cry me a river. HOWEVER, not knowing how this is going to go, it could be a walk home and that, my friends, would be cooold (I like to go with as little as I can get away with in the clothes department). Anyway, I decided that I would get on my most hated piece of equipment...the dreadmill. Total BAAARF. I find nothing more mind numbing than a trainer or dreadmill. So that I'm not 'that guy,' I had to wear an Ironman (or this Ironwoman shirt my friend made) piece of clothing. How lame is that? I feel like I need to have a flashing sign that says -I'M BETTER THAN THIS, THIS IS NOT ME. I'm not a speed demon or anything but I like to be able to run (not walk/run or jog at 4.5mph). Then I think of two bloggerland 'friends' - MJ and Marit. Marit has assured me that I will actually be able to run again. She was involuntarily 'laid off' from anything due to a terrible accident that included ~14 weeks of no running and I'm sure LOADS of rehab. A little break in the back will do that to a girl. Don't feel too bad (wink, wink), she's back at it and blazing fast (in my book). THEN, there's MJ. I have yet to figure out how he lost his leg but let's just say he's down to one. Yep, that's one leg. I read his training details and look at his goals and plans and think - I am a huge pu$$y (kinda like the criers on BL). I think it struck me the most when he posted about prosthetics and had a picture of his leg hanging next to his bike in transition. I'm sure he probably transitions faster than I do too, and HE has to get a leg on, WTF!, but I digress. Again, huge pu$$y but here it goes...

OK, guy on either side of me at the gym - this is never good, ego central, including my own.

Suck it up and you don't get to run more than 15 minutes.

Three minutes walking/warmup.

Ramp it 'up' to 5.0 MPH, hardly moving but just thinking keep your form, keep your form (thanks triswami, that's my coach).

Then I start thinking, it's OK to go slow, just don't breathe hard or crack a sweat. Look good doing it.

Certainly, I can go faster than this. Increase, 5.8, ah, a little better, momentum where I'm not eating the 'dashboard' of the dreadmill.

6.0 MPH is a littler nicer but hows about 6.3, that would be good, done.

Uh oh, 15 minutes gone, yep, no more deals with the devil...shut er down.

Done with no more pain than normal...just all new pains in all new places that I never noticed before. How the hell does that happen?

So there it is, my big 15 minute run in the books. It was everything I had not to school the guy next to me who was looking over my shoulder and just kept increasing his pace trying to suck me in to his evil web. I was able to resist and swam ~3000 instead.


untpawgal02 said...

15 minute run on the dreadmill... you're my hero :)

Melanie said...

i'm with ya about Joelle... la-la land. great job on the TM... not always fun, and good job resisting temptation!

The Running Girl said...

Way to get in your "first run back". I don't enjoy the dreadmill either and always run slower on it than I do outside. You'll be back in no time.

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

Joelle is worse than Hitler on CRACK!

Plus: Who's Joelle.

Adding, do you think Hitler's gonna bogart all that crack, or will he share?

Good job on the run, sister! This morning, I almost went for my first run in nearly 2 months, but was thwarted by snow and my own sloth.

Plus I hear you on the trying-not-to-sweat-because-I-want-to-look-good thing, because part of my PT is doing an elliptical for 10 minutes then a stationary bike for 10 more and I really don't want to come off as one of those other luuuzers in PT who seem to've injured themselves reaching for the pork rinds, by the looks of 'em ... cos, see, I'm better than they are because I did this to my knee by running ...

Except I get off the stationary bike and I'm sweating like Hitler on crystal meth.

So I'm just as much a luuuzer as the other PT foax, which I kinda already knew.

Wes said...

Yay! back to running!! Stay smart :-)

Dave said...

Alright Missy, I'm with ya on Joelle. All excuse, no action.

As far as the brown, I have to agree again. The dad's body is like a train, you don't want to look...but you can't help it.

Lastly...completely understand the ego thing. When I man an aid station for a race, I wear my latest ultramarathon shirt....what's up with I want them to think, "oh, he's a runner too!" I am a sad and pathetic being.:-) congrats on the 15 minute treadmill. I will have to give you my "king of the mountain" dreadmill workout...makes me want to write bad checks. ;-)

Jo Lynn said...

Any time on the treadmill is a drag. But, you did what you had to do. Good for you.

triguyjt said...

joelle ticked me off!!!

I felt real bad for Carla

Southbay Girl said...

OMG Joelle is an idiot!! I'm glad she's off but I feel bad for her former best friend!!

I'm impressed that you even got on the treadmill-i sold my treadmill!! That's how much I loved my treadmill!! But I guess since I live in So Cal I don't really need the dreaded treadmill!!!

Way to not be sucked in by tht dude!

Shannon said...

Joelle...poor thing is a train wreck that I can't look away from.

The Run go girl...I hate the suckmill too.

Ryan said...

Is it wrong that I'm hot for your Ironwoman logo?

Grrrr, down big boy!

Carly said...

I HATE the dreadmill. Good job getting on it.

I am also not a fan of Joelle.

Marit Chrislock-Lauterbach said...

Had to laugh at Ryan's comment about the ironwoman logo. Only because I know Ryan :)

See - NOT that bad. I promise! And even better for you for sticking to the plan and NOT getting sucked into the guy next to you's evil plot to "race". That's tough. Biggest thing I learned? Don't look at the pace or heart rate numbers. Just run for time, check the ego at the door, and be happy that you get to run. Your speed will return as you get stronger, I promise. Trust me :)

Nice job!

Ron said...

Love the ironman symbol

IronMissy - it's official!

IronMissy - it's official!
A vision in green!