It's official, I have IBS - not irritable bowel...Ironman Brain Scramble Syndrome. I can't hardly put together words, sentences or complete thoughts. I've been in meetings and lost my place completely. While others look at me strangely, those that know, know. I'm beyond tired and I'm beyond hungry. I keep fig newtons on my nightstand because I can't make it through the nite and I can fall asleep on the toilet. I fall asleep within two minutes of hitting the pillow only to awaken to pee (I'm very well hydrated) and eat a fig newton (I'm starving).
After this very hard, long week, we start to see the light - the light of a recovery week, the light of Ironman right around the corner, the light of the 'sling shot' (Nick says this is a must do ride) in Panama City Beach, FL as you approach the finish line. I swear, that's all I can think about when I'm out running these days...just think about the lights, when you start to see the lights, you're almost home free. Free from what, I'm not so sure, but you're almost home, you will be an Ironman. Last nite, however, I was possessed with miles 15-24 of the run. As I was finishing my 2:30 run last nite, I thought I was going to jump in front of the next car during the last 20 minutes, I was SO over it. I just wanted to be home, home with my family, home with the dogs, home with a beer. All I could tell myself is THIS is what miles 15-24 are gonna feel like so get over yourself. This will be the true test of wills, for me.
To all my friends that I'm neglecting, I'm sorry. To the friends and training partners that I DO talk to right now, I'm sorry too because I'm not making much sense right now. I've been given assurance that IBS will pass and I will return to normal, or normal for me, at least. Thanks for hanging in there with me. It's less than a month away, holy shit! Didn't I just sign up last week!?